As a blonde, blue-eyed woman of average height, I get asked out a lot more, though I'm not 100% sure dating's actually any easier!
So, contrary to popular belief, my dating life on the whole has actually been more successful after transition than it was before, as a cis gay man.
Back when I identified as a gay man, my short stature was a liability, since the mainstream gay world is into tall, muscular guys.
There's nothing I can do about my height to resist these norms, but I can certainly say that I'm not a "small" person, aside from physically, and guys come to see that soon after meeting me.
However, some things are near inescapable; I wish I had a penny for every time a guy called me a "firecracker" as a compliment.
That's low-key why I always feel the need to have my hair with a bit of body — to make up for lost ground.
That self-consciousness definitely stems over into my dating life too, and with online dating even more.But over time, I noticed that it was hardly a problem in my dating life — in fact, almost all of the guys I dated in my teens and twenties were six feet or taller.That's not to say that tall men are better, but that my own physical size didn't restrict me to any specific height range within the straight male population.And as I got older, more and more men I dated would comment on it: "I love how I can pick you up," "You're so cute and little," and even, "I'm only dating Chaya-sized girls from now on." I got rid of him shortly after.One even said explicitly, "I feel so manly with you." It's sort of been a firsthand exercise in how a lot of guys associate traits they see as childlike with femininity — they equate my height with an overall smallness, and that then makes them feel "big," playing into a traditionally desirable gender binary and power structure between men and women.Plus, navigating the world of dating is already a mess, so being on an extreme end of any physical spectrum doesn't exactly make it any easier.