"You're really special and you have a lot to give," Palmer said.
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"It's about being intellectual with your beliefs and realizing they aren't true," instead of being completely emotional, she said. Whether it's getting online (which is how Palmer met her husband), classes, or social meetups for post 50s, "get out of your house, because a lot of us do the same routine everyday at [this] point in our lives," she said.
"We need to be proactive in going places where you're going to potentially meet eligible men." Once you've reeled in a man of interest, there are a few things the mature woman dating over 50 needs to know.
"You don't need to share about your kids who are ungrateful, your bankruptcy case from five years ago or your gout," Palmer said. "Is he giving you the feelings that you've identified [are important to you] in your list?
It's about getting that intellect back and making good choices." If the person you've found continues to hit all the new and approved adult checkmarks you've made for yourself, great!There's still the matter of erasing "those recordings that play in your head about men and relationships," Palmer said."'Men only want sex, men don't want relationships...' It's about getting past your limiting beliefs." Palmer acknowledges that these beliefs can become as automatic as "blinking," but said it's a matter of first recognizing that those beliefs exist and working through why you feel that way. "Make a plan of where and how you're going to meet the right men and how to get a date," Palmer advised.Unreliability and confusion do not have to be a part of your dating-over-50 experience, dating coach Bobbi Palmer told Huff/Post50."A lot of people who are dating in their 50s probably haven't dated since they were [in their 20s] -- they're paralyzed, they still have the old vision of themselves and the old vision of the boys they were dating," Palmer said."We all mature -- most of us -- and this is the best time for anyone to date." Though there are new realities to deal with if you're dating after 50 (illness, sandwich generation concerns, menopause or impotence), it shouldn't dampen your love life or make you settle for anyone less than who you deserve.